I've pretty much always been mad skeptical towards Valentine's Day, and as I grew older that skepticism grew exponentially. I won't get into complaining about Valentine's Day, because complaining is for losers and the Valentine's Day hustle is so obvious that you don't need me to break it down for you. What I will do is provide you with examples on how to approach it from a different angle.
Change the Game
Traditionally Valentine's Day has been framed as a very female centric holiday, with men expected to sweep women off their feet with some grand gestures to show their love for the woman. If you have game though, then Valentine's Day doesn't necessarily have to play out in that fashion. I suggest that men switch things up and reframe Valentines Day as their own holiday. Like all men with game know, if you lead the way and set the frame then the women will follow. Most men approach Valentine's Day like a sucker and empty their wallets trying to come off as the man and prove their love, but instead I suggest you switch things up and make the woman impress you on Valentine's Day. This will mess with their head because they're not used to having the shoe on the other other foot. If you reframe Valentine's Day as your day then you communicate to them that you have high value and that women in the past have catered to you on this day. Even if you've been simpin' for a decade buying roses and See's candy like Joe Average, she doesn't know that, so start your new legacy this year and shed the lame behavior of your past. Most of the time guys come up on the short end of the stick on Valentine's Day, dropping serious coin in hopes of coming of like a G, and many times not necessarily getting any appreciation shown for the effort. Make her work hard on Valentine's Day to show her love for you. Most guy's don't have the balls to do this and your boldness and trailblazing nature will shine through and highlight your alphaness.
Examples of things to say:
"You know a lot of guys aren't into Valentine's Day, but I always like when the woman I'm with really goes all out to try and impress me on Valentine's Day. I love it when a woman steps out from the norm and doesn't act like the typical woman and sit back and expect the man to put in all the effort"
"I hope you got something nice ready for me on Valentine's Day. I don't want to be let down on my favorite holiday"
"I remember one year I broke up with a girlfriend shortly after Valentine's Day. Her lack of effort really opened my eyes to how much better I could do and that we just weren't right for each other. A bottle of cologne was all she could come up with? That's weak, don't you think?"
Don't Be Average
Now if you are going to play the Valentine's Day game, at least don't come off generic with it. Dinner, flowers, candy, perfume, spa gift certificate, etc. are all examples of examples of average tactics that you should avoid. A man with game stands stands out and original and authentic with it. Here are a few alternatives you can employ to express your love and admiration for that special someone, or the one one that is at the top of your roster for the time being:
- Picnic--Women love these things an it shows you put a little thought into the day. They're fairly inexpensive as well if you play it right. Of course add a bottle of wine to the mix to make it thorough, along with a fly location, and you're winning. A fly picnic will stay in her Valentine's Day memory and will her thinking about you even after you have broken up or moved on, especially when her next boyfriend shows up with some wilted grocery store/freeway off-ramp flowers and a generic card. There's nothing like that getting that "how are things?" text long after you've broken up with a woman, signaling her desperation to try and get back in your mix. Set the standard.
- Scavenger Hunt-- The scavenger hunt idea takes a little bit more work, but it can be a fun alternative and it once again shows you've put some thought into things. Don't make the hunt too difficult or complicated and be sure to include locations that have had some significance, i.e. places you went on dates early in the relationship, favorite hangouts, etc. Always make the final location your spot for obvious reasons.
Other fly ideas include a gondola ride, a hot air balloon ride, a horse and carriage ride in the park, home cooked gourmet dinner, vintage jewelry, hiring a musician/band for the evening, writing and perform an original song, etc. Use your imagination or steal a fly idea from someone else. Whatever works.
Single on Valentine's Day
If you're single on Valentine's Day then it's very easy to scoop up single women. Many will be down in the dumps because they're not hitched, so that will make it that much easier for you to get in. If you hit up spots on Valentine's Day it will be very easy to spot the single ladies, so go in and do your thing.
You could also organize a singles only Valentine's party with your friends. Rather than sit around alone, you might as well socialize with other folks that aren't caught up in a relationship, and once again the crowd will be full of single women so you'll have a chance to kick game and see if there are any viable candidates.
Is This Relationship What You Really Want?
On Sunday tons of couples will be spending Valentine's Day together and a nice chunk of those folks won't necessarily be happy with the person they're with. Use Valentine's Day as a reminder to reflect and figure out if the person you're with is truly someone you want to continue a relationship with. Don't enter Valentine's Day hoping that it will somehow reignite the flame in your relationship, when in fact it will probably open your eyes even wider to the fact that you're not where you want to be with who you want to be with. Could you do better? Are you settling? Are you afraid of being alone? Is there someone else you would rather take a shot at that? Would the person you're with be happier with someone else? Think about these things before you participate in a charade and waste your time and money. It may seem like a callous move to severe a relationship around Valentine's Day but you're only doing yourself and the one you're with a disservice if your heart isn't truly in it.
The world is yours.....
Ryan Leslie - "Valentine"
Add me on Facebook and follow me on Twitter.