5 Ways To Make Your First Date an Epic Fail

I always enjoy comical stories of how people went on first dates with someone they thought they would hit it off with, only to be grossly disappointed when the actual event went down.  The first date is a monumental event in the mating game and it's essential to make sure your game is tight so you will prevail at the end. Here are 5 ways to make your date an epic fail. I see and hear about folks doing these things all the time and it baffles me why they don't realize the error on their ways.


1.  Catching a Flick

This is the single lamest first date activity ever.  Why on Earth would you think that sitting in a dark theater watching a most likely marginal movie that you had to drop damn near $15 a ticket for would be a good move?  You're not 15 trying to feel up on Julie from the JV cheerleading squad because your parents are home and you have no car or license and no other chance to get her in a dark place.  After 2 hours and $25 or so in the hole (hopefully she doesn't want concessions, and if she does that may be a bad sign since she may have poor dietary habits) you basically have nothing to show for it.  You could talk about the movie, but if the movie sucked then your conversation will hit a brick wall and you don't want to dwell on negativity on the first date.  The movie is the ultimate wack time filler.  On top of that it really exposes your lack of originality and game.  Do you really think she's going to find you compelling if you can't even come up with a decent first date idea?  The first date is a clue to how you will be in a relationship.  Do you think any woman ever goes back to her girls talking about how great her movie date was?  Get off that Roger Ebert steeze and step your game up. Being average=death.

2. Showing Up With A Dozen Roses

Showing up with roses is a sucker move.  You think you're coming off like a gentleman, but it really makes you look like a simp.  I asked a few female associates of mine how they would react or have reacted to a man bringing roses on a first date.  Here is a sample of their replies:

"He's trying to f@#$ and coming off way too strong"
"I'd feel a little pressured, like he's putting too much on it"
"He must not have gotten any action lately and is trying too hard to please"
"What a sweet gesture"
"What is he, 13 years old or something?"

Now 4 of those 5 responses are direct evidence that the roses move is a failure, and the one that appears positive potentially puts you in the "nice guy" bracket which usually leads to no action. Showing up with roses shows that you overly eager to please as well as that you're unoriginal.  If you're going to be the flower guy, which I don't recommend, at least pick something unconventional or rare that shows your flower game is strong.  Once again, roses are an average guy move and average=death. Like 3 Stacks and Big Boi said, "roses really smell like boo-boo."

3. Talking About Your Job Too Much

People go out on dates in order to relax, connect with someone, and have a good time.  Some people have trouble letting go of their work once they leave the office, and these people are usually stuck at home by themselves.  You may think being a workaholic and who's dedicated to your job is a plus, but that doesn't mean women want to hear about it all through your date.  Dates are an escape and talking about your job just takes them back to grind of a 9-5.  Unless you have a fly as hell career that is off the hook interesting like rock star, then you might be better off leaving the work conversation to a minimum.  You may think your life as a CPA is interesting, or that your tales of how Jim from marketing is always stealing your Vitamin Water from the break room is riveting, but no one else is feelin' it.  Keep the TPS report  talk at your cubicle and steer the conversation toward more thought provoking and attraction building topics.

4. Bringing Up Past Relationship Failures

Once again, steer away from negative talk.  If you sit there talking about your past failures it makes it seem like you're wrapped up in the past and imprints her mind that she too will possibly be one of those relationship failures.  If you start talking about your past relationship failures, then she's liable to do the same.  When you get a girl talking about her past relationship failures then you're running the risk of instantly turning into one of her girls.  Do you really want to hear her cackling about how Andre cheated on her with her co-worker, or how Mark spent too much time with his friends and never gave her quality time?  Of course you don't.  You're trying to highlight how fly it is to roll with you, not to let her be a shoulder for you to cry on about her own past failures.  If you have game then you leave them better than when you got with them and you won't have any past failures to discuss anyway.

5. Not Getting Physical

Now when I say physical I don't mean that you're trying to cop a feel after she laughs at a couple of your jokes.  What I mean is that you need to physically touch her and establish her being comfortable with you touching her.  Now to do this, you don't have to be vulgar or put too much on it.  Getting physical can mean touching her arm while you're both laughing at the hilarious joke you told, grabbing her waist as you hold open the door for her and move throughout the venue, wiping the corner of her mouth at dinner, etc.  All these subtle touches subconsciously establish a comfort level that she must reach with you before you're ever going to get to anywhere.  Whether you're trying to seal the deal on the first date or not, if you're not touching her throughout that first date the love train is probably going to leave you standing next to the tracks. Many guys make the mistake of trying to be too gentlemanly on the first date and don't touch as if the woman's Mom is chaperoning or something.

Don't be average and don't pull any of the above moves on a first date.

The world is yours.....

Outkast - "Roses"


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Should You Allow A Woman To Make You Wait 90 Days?

I was perusing my Google reader and stumbled upon this article advising women to wait 90 days before having sex with a man, and that somehow the "good" men will wait.  I've heard other folks such as Steve Harvey advise women to follow this rule as well.  I feel that was a Man Code Violation on Mr. Harvey's part for advising women to do that, but I understand he's a hustler and he was catering to the demographic that was going to bring checks in. It sounds good and it gives women some sense of empowerment to withhold the goods from a man, but I'm vehemently opposed to this whole policy and line of thinking.  Let me break down why a man whould never engage in this type of situation, and why the rule is inherently flawed.

A Man with Game Determines The Rules

A man with Game will never fall into a trap where the rules of the game are determined by the woman. The minute you walk into a situation where you let a woman control what's going down and when it's going down, you've already ceded power to her and let her know that you're not in control.  How is she going to respect you if she knows you're sitting around putting X's on a calendar leading up to that oh so glorious day when you finally get the privelage of having sex with wonderful old her?  What part of the game is that?  A man that allows himself to be put in that position is revealing his low worth and the woman knows this.  Women desire men that other women desire, and if you're willing to take yourself off the market for 90 days while she deems if you're not worthy enough, then obviously you're not that hot on the open market. Guys that suffer from oneitis will fall into this trap easily.


This Rule Uses An Arbitrary Time Period That Has No Basis In Rationality

What is so magical about 90 days?  It's a made up period and there is no reason for it.  It sounds good and it gives women some false sense of security that if a man is willing to wait 90 days then he is somehow more honorable or respectable than a man who won't.  What makes a woman think that she can even truly know a man after 90 days?  And what happens if after 90 days you have sex with a man and within a few months things go sour?  What if you wait 90 days and there's no sexual compatibility? Was the relationship somehow more pure because you waited 90 days?  No, it was just another short term relationship, except you spent 90 days with your clothes on instead of 150 without them. Keeping it real is the way to go, and hanging onto a false sex of security by witholding sex just leaves you delusional and sexually frustrated.


The 90 Day Rule Commodifies Sex

Waiting 90 days for sex leads credence to the belief that somehow sex is some type of commodity in the relationship marketplace.  If you meet a woman and have a great time, the chemistry is amazing, you're both sexually attracted to each other, and you don't have any STDs, why on Earth would you wait 90 days?  Right when you put a waiting period on sex you're turning sex into something that is to be traded and valued like a commodity.  Women worry about men only trying to get with them for sex, and it's true some men are only out for that, but many other men want a great relationship as well.  If a woman is sitting around and holding sex hostage, then it shows that she is more worried about sex than actually catering to your needs and connecting with you.  It's as if women think we have to show our worth in order to have sex with them.  A man with Game sees it the other way and evaluates women to see if they're worthy of having sex with him.  By withholding sex a woman is basically telling you that she deems having sex with you to be of less value than you having sex with her.  Once again, that automatically puts her in the drivers seat and if you're a man with Game that isn't acceptable.


Life is Short

In the times we live in the world is rapidly changing before our eyes.  90 days is a long time for you to put your life on hold while a woman waits to deem if you're a good man.  Think of all the other women you could possibly be meeting in that 90 day period who might be more desirable than the one who's put you on the waiting list?  The woman of your dreams could walk right by you, but you'll miss out because you're holding onto a dream that this one girl is so spectacular that the 90 day wait will be worth it. 


There are several other reasons why the 90 Day Rule is a fail, but I'll end things for now and touch on this topic at a later time.  So fellas, if a woman tries to spring the old 90 Day Rule on you, then do the smart thing and keep it moving.  If you feel the woman is worth waiting the 90 days for, then proceed at your own risk. She might be the flyest woman on the market and in the end you'll win.  Every man has to make decisions that suit him best, but before you do proceed, think about all the reasons why shouldn't entertain the thought of falling into the 90 day matrix.

The world is yours.....

Janet Jackson- "Let's Wait Awhile"


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Bad Boys Finish First, Nice Guys Are Finished Before They Even Started

One of the cornerstones of Game is to kill the nice guy inside you.  Now I'm not a proponent of becoming a complete asshole and disrespecting women, but one of the top reasons why certain guys continue to strike out is that they misconstrue what women mean when they say, "I just want a nice guy."

First off, don't believe what women tell you because they will tell you some nonsense and you'll sit by and watch as they go after the opposite of the dude they tell you they like.  Few woman are going to say "I want a guy that can knock the pictures off the wall when we have sex, keeps me on my toes by being unpredictable, and helps me escape from the mundane existence I currently lead."  They're going to give that bs answer, "I want a nice guy that treats me right", which may be partially true but can lead you down the road to solo Blockbuster nights, movie night with your parents, or cuddle parties.  Here's a quick rundown of why being a nice guy will throw a monkey wrench in your game and why being a bad boy trumps being a nice guy:

 

Nice Guys Are Average

Women say one thing and mean the other. Women may say they want a nice guy, but that doesn't mean that they just want a nice guy. Women like men with a little edge to them.  Some women will disagree, but most of the top notch females that are high on the desirability list that I know don't want some average nice guy smiles a lot, is overly agreeable, and has no edge to him.  You don't necessairly need to be a convict, Hell's Angel, or MMA guy, but if your style is vanilla you won't be tasting her ice cream anytime soon.  Why would a woman want someone who's average? Think about that the next time you're at The Gap buying a pair of Chinos or watching that lame TV show that everyone watches.  Yeah, you're average so switch the style up.
 

Bad Boys Are More Confident Than Nice Guys 

The nice guy kills things by acting entirely too supplicative and cow towing to a woman's every desire.  This may seem like a great thing on the surface, but it will kill your game.  Bad boys reek of confidence because they tend to give off an "I don't give a f@#$ vibe" that women are attracted to.  Nice guys follow societal rules and think inside the box.  A bad boy lives by his own rules and is confident that things will work out.  They don't desire the approval of women like the nice guy does, and that is a turn on to women.  The bad boy knows there are tons of women out there at his disposable, while the nice guy is a sucker for love and becomes victim of oneitis, thinking that some average girl he met with a nice figure and cute smile is the only one for him and the greatest thing since sliced bread.
 

Bad Boys Are More Exciting Than Nice Guys

Nice guys are mad predictable and women desire unpredictability and excitement.  Why is a woman going to trip over you if you're on that flowers, dinner, and a movie vibe?  Why is a woman going to dig you if you stick to the script?  A bad boy does things the regular guy doesn't, takes her places she's never been, and exposes her to things she's not familiar with.  Nice guys win in cheesy romantic comedies that Hollywood shoves down our throughts, but that mess is just an illuision and the real world operates differently.

Bad Boys Are More of a Challenge, and Women Love a Challenge

 They love the bad boy, but knows that in the long term he won't be a suitable husband, so in their heads they feel they can change him.  While the nice guy does everything a woman wants, listens to her, and doesn't rock the boat, the bad boy is the exact opposite.  Women see the bad boy as a makeover project at times, and will spend their time trying to smooth out the rough edges.  Women love makeovers, and trying to tame a bad boy is the ultimate makeover.  Now being a badboy might not work as well on women in their late 20 and early 30's because that biological clock is ticking, but at that point you can just go after younger women or refine your bad boy persona to be more age appropriate.  That's on you.

Bad Boys Aren't Deceptive Like Nice Guys  

Nice guys appear nice on the surface, but in reality they are the biggest snakes because they're only acting nice because they seek a woman's approval and eventually their sexual companionship.  Women can see right throught this, so they respect the bad boy more because he tends to let his intentions be known from the jump, instead of trying to be all friendly, beating around the bush in the hopes that the friendship will turn to romance. That's why nice guys routinely get stuck in the friend zone because they start off being entirely too nice and not giving off a sexual vibe, and then when they try to make their move the woman has already dismissed the possibility of anything sexual between them.  Nice guys think they can hop from the friend zone to the bedroom, but only a select few have that ability.

There are several more reasons,with science to back them up, but this is a blog and not a book so I'll keep it brief.  Now being a bad boy is great, but if you come across as a fake bad boy then that's just as bad as being the nice guy.  Your image must be congruent with your actions, so don't try to roll up in a Harley with a leather jacket and then sound like Steve Urkel while you discuss your day as as insurance salesman or some other non-bad boy type gig.  The ultimate goal is to be a hybrid bad boy/nice guy, which is irresistable and  something I'll delve into at a later time. 

The world is yours.....

88 Keys - "Nice Guys Finish Last"

Pharcyde - "Passin' Me By"

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Man Code Violation: Japanese Lap Pillow

I ran across this earlier today and it quickly caught my eye.  This is a serious Man Code Violation here.  In fact, any dude that purchases this probably violates the Man Code on a daily basis.

Instead of buying lap pillows, dudes need to step their game up so they can have women laying in their laps. Don't be that guy that resorts to buying one of these joints.

The world is yours.....

Outkast- "She Lives In My Lap"

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Man Code Quote of the Day for December 22, 2009

If you have zest and enthusiasm you attract zest and enthusiasm. Life does give back in kind. -- Norman Vincent Peale

The World Is Yours....

Parliament Funkadelic - "Motor Booty Affair"


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Bar/Club Game: To Drink Or Not To Drink?

Like many OGs and followers of the science of Game, I'm an advocate of staying sober in bars and clubs if your mission is to procure the company of women.  For some people the idea of going out on the town and not drinking is akin to blasphemy.  I can understand why folks would scoff at the notion of partying sober, but if you want your game to be at it's tightest then I'm a staunch advocate of keeping it clean.


There are several reasons why developing your night game while sober is the best move.  Let me briefly break down some of the top reasons you should switch out your vodka tonic for a glass of Sprite instead.


1.  Drinks are overpriced and you could be using that money on several other things that will benefit your life more than a buzz at a bar or club.  I remember how it used to be when I drank at clubs when I was single versus how it is now that I don't really get my drink on like that.  If you're posted at a more upscale spot, you might be dropping $10 plus for drinks.  If you figure you have 3-4 drinks, that's going to be around $40 in addition to a tip of around $5-$10.  That's assuming you didn't pay a cover, which I'm highly against and which you should not have to ever pay if you pick the right spots and or step your game up and know the right people, bringing your total to around $50.  Times that by at least one night out a week, and you're dropping a minimum of $200 on drinks alone right there.  Imagine if you invested that money, put it in a Roth IRA, used it to upgrade your wardrobe, paid off some credit cards or student loans, or put it in a nice vacation fund so you can take some time out to relax and flex your international game.



2.  Drinks are a crutch, and if your game is tight then you won't need them.  Liquor is literally liquid courage to many guys on the hunt for females.  You see them out, posted on the wall gripping their drink , scared like they're at a junior high sock hop.  After a few drinks most guys tend to loosen up and then start to go in on a few women.  Instead of waiting for that buzz to kick in, just walk in and start gaming immediately.  You don't need liquor to have a good time, and your goal is to attract the fly ladies anyway.  If you play your cards right, you can get your drink on back at your house, where that $50 you saved could buy you a top shelf bottle of something nice you can share with the lady lucky enough to be with you for the evening.  That bottle will last you more than a few episodes as well.  Recession game!



3.  Drinks distort your perception of reality.  Everyone knows about the dreaded beer goggles effect, but think about how those same beers effect your perception of situations at hand. I've seen a few dudes leave the club who must have been wearing Absinthe goggles.  If you have a few drinks in you, that average girl with a somewhat bland personality suddenly starts coming off entirely more interesting than she really is.  Then after you chill with her during the follow up episode while you're sober, you start noticing all the annoying aspects of her personality.  She says like too much, she has an annoying laugh, she runs her mouth, etc, etc.  You're sitting there thinking, "Damn, why the hell was I into this woman?".  Blame it on the liquor.  If you game sober, then you're always minding your P's and Q's and you'll never let alcohol affect your better judgement.  No buyer's remorse for the sober players, plus it's comedy to see how foolish people act in bars/clubs when the majority of them are tipsy and you're not.  Free entertainment.



4.  Getting a DUI is unacceptable.  Not only do a ton of people leave bars/clubs too drunk to drive and in turn put themselves and others at risk, but the possibility of getting a DUI alone should make you chill on the drinking.  Ever been locked up, even for an overnight stay?  I hear it's not a good look, nor is paying attorney fees and substantial fines that will put a dent in your wallet.  Top that off with increased insurance rates, and you've got yourself a screwed up situation.


Now many people will still say, "what's the use in going out if I can't get nice with a few drinks?"  I'm not mad at you if you still want to drink, but a wise man is always up to try something new. If you're wonder about how you'll be perceived if you're not drinking, then just sip a Sprite or something else that looks like it could be liquor and no one will notice.  I suggest you try out sober game and compare your results to when you're gettin' your drink on.  I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at how your game gets tighter and the quality of your women improves as well.


The world is yours.....


Jamie Foxx feat, T-Pain - "Blame It"


EPMD- "You Had Too Much To Drink"


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Music Game: J. Period & Nneka Present "The Madness"

My background is in music, going back to my days in college working on radio shows and writing, to my stint working on the business side of things at a music pub after graduation, to working in a marketing position for the biggest music conglomerate in the biz, in addition to dabbling in production as well.  My knowledge of music has always impressed the ladies, so I would highly suggest that you stay on top of the latest happenings in the music world.  If you're able to expose women to new music they haven't heard yet you will not only come off looking like the man, but you will also stand out from the average Joes who listen to the same ol same ol, and can't really recommend the freshest sounds. If women don't frequently ask you, "who is that?", when you're  playing tunes in your ride or at your spot, then you need to step your music game up.  I'll keep the recommendations coming, but the rest is on you.

J. Period & Nneka Present "The Madness (Onye-Ala)" just came out on the 15th and it's pure fire.  Many dudes don't really listen to music by females, but this mixtape, a prelude to Nneka's US debut Concrete Jungle coming out February 2, 2010 , is a sure shot.  In the last few years artists like M.I.A. and Santigold have blown up, and this girl is more soulful and grittier than those two.  She's already released material overseas, but folks stateside aren't up on her, so you'll be the first one up on this "new" artist in your circle of friends and the ladies.  Nneka is the truth, so go ahead and grab the zip file, put it on your iPod, and say to yourself, "damn Cinque was right!"

Download the 2nd single: Nneka featuring Jay Electronica - "Walkin" (J. Period Remix) -Mediafire link


Download the entire mixtape:  J. Period & Nneka Present "The Madness (Onye-Ala)" - (zip file--right click and save)

Links:
Nneka@ MySpace
Press Release w/ track listing and background info
Nneka @ Allmusic.com

The World Is Yours.....

Nneka- "Walking"



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Man Code Violation: Self-Castration - What Part of The Game Is That?

Colombian farmer Luis Alfonso Sanchez committed what might be one of the worst Man Code violations possible. I actually feel sorry for this dude because he's obviously mentally unstable and has committed a monumental mistake.  He decided to cut off his testicles because his wife wouldn't have sex with him and he didn't want to cheat on her because he's a Christian.  Although there is no logical reason for doing this, followers of Christianity and those up on their scripture can cite Ephesians 5:22 to prove that he has in fact not only violated The Man Code, but also allowed his wife to stray from the wishes of God as stated in the Bible.

Ephesians 5:22 states, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord."

Luis Alfonso Sanchez, you went out.......smh.

The world is yours.  Don't cut off your manhood like Luis did if your wife isn't giving you any loving.

Souls of Mischief - "What A Way To Go Out"


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Bitch Is The New Black, and You're Wack

I came across this article profiling a young African-American female from DC this morning in the Washington Post.  She laments about how hard it is for a single Black woman to find a man. She's in the process of writing a book and has already secured a film deal.  I was weary of even wasting my time with the article, because her argument is played out and I've found that many of these women that are in the "I can't find a decent Black man" camp are very flawed and fail to grasp the reality of their situations and the true reason they're alone.  Granted, Black males in this country are locked up at disproportionate rates and have a whole set of issues we need to work on, but there are tons of eligible Black men out there.  They just don't want women like Helen Andrews, and the ones that might are not worthy in her eyes.  Let's break down why this Helen Andrews character is sitting up in her apartment, alone in her Snuggie, while others have found a way to snag the men she can't seem to attract.

1.  Your degrees and high status job don't make us want you

To be frank, men don't care about your degrees.  Granted we might prefer to have someone educated and well read, but that doesn't necessarily mean we're more attracted to you if you went to an Ivy League institution.  The women that think these degrees and jobs automatically make them a catch are delusional.  There's more to life than your status.  These women have spent all this time on educating themselves and moving up the corporate ladder that they forgot to cultivate a decent personality along the way. 


2.  If you're a bitch, don't expect legit men to waste their time with you

In the article she admits that she is mean, acts like a bitch, and her friend backs this up.  Why on Earth do you think a man wants to deal with you if you're a bitch?  That's the opposite of what we want.  That's so basic that it baffles me that she hasn't realized that is one of the main reasons she's alone.  The only man that wants a bitch is someone with low self esteem or has some other latent issues of their own.  Guys like women that are nice, social, subservient, domestically inclined, caring, giving, and sexually appealing.  She appears to be none of those.

3. There's nothing wrong with men without degrees or high powered jobs

I've run across so many women that have this list of requirements that men need to fulfill, but that list basically cuts off a large percentage of men.  So what if a guy doesn't have a degree or a high powered job?  That doesn't mean he won't make a decent mate, a loving father, and a provider for his family.  Women have bought into the American myth that college is a requirement for success.  I've met brilliant folks that don't have degrees or dropped out because school wasn't their bag.  She has a narrow view of what a good catch is.

4.  Negative energy attracts negative results

All throughout the article she talks about herself without asking if she is the reason for the problem.  She can't take it upon herself to realize that maybe she is the reason she's alone.  Just reading the article, I couldn't imagine even having a decent conversation with her.  She appears pessimistic, socially inept, and bitchy, along with displaying a conspicuous sense of entitlement. I wouldn't consider going out with her for a second.  The brothers in D.C. are making the right move by dodging her.

Fellas, please continue to avoid the Helen Andrews of the world.  She deserves to be alone until she steps her game up and lets go of all that unattractive bitterness emanating from her soul.  There are so many attractive women out there, that if you waste your time with ones like her then you're a sucker of the highest degree.

The world is yours.....

Guy - "Let's Chill"

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Don't Ask, Just Tell

One of the first steps along the road to success with a woman, unless you're on a sex the same night type mission, is getting the phone number.  Many guys get nervous or fumble this seemingly simple act.  Some will take too long to ask for the number, revealing more info than needed, when they could have gotten the number early and moved on to other pursuits, be it working the room or getting home to talk to the woman you met last night.  If you can't get a woman's phone number then you're striking out before the first pitch, and that's not a way to go out.  Getting the number is not as big of a deal as many make it out to be.  Here are a few tips to help you secure the number so that you can move on to more important matters.

Tell Her To Give You Her Number, Don't Ask For It!

This technique is gold because you're not asking for a woman's number, you're instructing her to give it to you.  Many may be afraid to do this because it appears a little too direct on the surface, but once you've tried it a few times you'll be amazed at how effective it is.  The beauty of this method is that you convey a few things early on:

a.) You're used to getting your way.  A yellow bellied simp would never have the balls to tell a woman to give her his number, so right there you're projecting your alphaness and coming across as someone who takes charge and leads.  Women want a man who knows what he wants and goes after it.  If you're all shy and soft spoken when asking for the number, that's how she thinks you'll be in regards to other areas of life.

b.)  You're socially savvy and are a seasoned veteran in regards to picking up women.  Some guys have the misconception that just because you come off smooth and seasoned that women will assume that you're a player and be turned off.  The opposite is the case.  Talk to a woman and they'll tell you the multitude of men they have dealt with that have no clue, no game, and interacting with these guys is a chore and a bore. These are the guys that get told things like "I can't give out my number" or "How about you give me your number instead".  You never want to be that guy.

You'd be surprised at how women will listen and follow your lead if you man up and approach situations in a bold and confident manner.  Women want a man who takes charge, is comfortable in his own skin, and gets what he wants out of life.  So give them what they want.  It's the least you can do.

Sample Line:

"It's been cool talking to you.  Go ahead and put your number in my phone and maybe I'll give you a call next week and we can (fill in the blank with some activity or interest you share)."

I suggest getting numbers instead of e-mail or saying you'll hit her up on Facebook.  Why create more barriers and steps than you need to go through?  And obviously, don't go for a number until you've built up the proper amount of rapport and attraction.

The world is yours...

Al Green- "Call Me"



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Is Los Angeles The Toughest Town For Singles? Not If You Have Game!

The Huffington Post ran an article today by Dr. Alex Benzer titled Is Los Angeles The Toughest Town For Singles?  The Average Joe would read the article, nod his head in agreement, and think "Yeah it is hard to date here, it's not just me!."  An adherent of the Lifetime Game philosophy would quickly figure out ways to sidestep all of these so-called obstacles that the author lays out in the article.  Problems are just opportunities for us to use our minds to come up with solutions.  Now let me go through Benzer's article and see how the Lifetime Game philosophy views each of his points.

1. According to the Singles Map, the sex ratio in LA sucks.

Benzer makes a decent point when he cites the fact that the male to female ratio in Los Angeles is ridiculously wack.  There are way too many dudes here, contrary to the whole stereotype that California is overflowing with women.  He claims there is a surplus of 89,000 more single men than women, but so what?  This just provides you incentive to make sure your game is tight at all times.  You can sit back and whine, or just figure out ways for you to stick out from the competition.  All the guys I know that have game in Los Angeles are doing alright, so maybe the fact that there's just a surplus of men without game is the greater issue at hand.

2. Large distances in the world’s biggest city create a real barrier to intimacy.  

This is a problem? This is where I call bulls***.  This so-called problem of  the city being too sprawled out is all mental.  Deal with the women in your immediate area and lock it down there before you venture out into other areas of the city.  I see the sprawled out landscape as a plus, especially if you're the type that dates multiple women.  Not that I advocate cheating or being a womanizer, but you're much less likely to run into your other women if they're spread out in South Los Angeles, Brentwood, Silverlake, etc. Also, the distance can keep you from getting too caught up with one girl and not exploring your options like you should before settling down in a relationship.


3. Lack of pedestrian culture reduces opportunities for casual contact.


Get out of the car and start walking.  Just because everyone else is driving their car, doesn't mean you have to follow suit.  Live in a pedestrian friendly neighborhood such as Echo Park, Silverlake, Hollywood, etc. and you'll run into women all day on the street.  You can also utilize public transportation in the form of buses and trains, in addition to the option of riding your bike as well.  There's mad folks in LA that eschew the car culture, but if you're stuck on the 405 all day and sitting in your apartment, then you'll never meet them.  Ditching your car also helps the environment and can save you loot on gas that you can use to improve your game in other areas.


4. Transportation challenges make even the best-intentioned people flaky.

You don't want any lame women that flake on you because of traffic.  If you're missing out on dates because of traffic, then you have more game problems than you're brave enough to admit. 

5. The transience of the city’s entertainment culture adds an aura of impermanence and unreliability to social ties.

Don't date actresses or any other female on the hunt for a life of stardom.   These people are usually narcissistic and neurotic anyway, so why waste your time?  There are tons of fly women with regular gigs, or even entertainment gigs behind the scenes that are well adjusted and open to dating men with the sufficient amount of game.

6. Dating people in the entertainment industry is fraught with unique challenges.

See my response to #5.

7. Nightlife shuts down at 1am and you have to drive your own butt home afterwards.

Improve your day game so that you're not limited to the traditional night date.  Complaining about the 2am closure time of bars is weak sauce and reeks of something someone who uses liquor as a crutch would bring up.  Even if bars shut down at 10PM, those with game would still prevail.  If the bar closes at 2am, make sure you know about the underground after hours spots, or just make sure you have some fly sounds and a chill atmosphere at your crib.  Why do you want to be stuck in a bar or club all night anyway?


The world is yours....


Blair- Night Life



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Sowing Your Wild Oats - Nutrition/Supplement Game: Avena Sativa (Oat Straw/Oatmeal)

Your health is a major factor in not only the overall effectiveness of your game, but also your success in several other areas of life as well.  Many times men will strive for success in their career, overly concern themselves with what type of car they drive or what type of clothes they wear, and try come up with slick pick-up lines, but completely ignore the importance of what they put into their body. 

One way you can get a leg up on the competition is to eat healthy and take the right supplements.  Supplements that improve your mental focus and sexual performance/drive and are highly effective ways of making your game more high powered.  Many of us start the day off with a horrendous meal consisting of such things as coffee, donuts, sugary cereals we ate as a kid and never gave up, carb heavy bagels, or candy bars masquerading as energy bars.  One way to step up your game is to start eating oatmeal or start taking the supplement Avena Sativa (Oat Straw).  Below are a few key reasons this is something you should do immediately if you want a simple way to enhance your game or fight some problems that men never want to have.


Benefits of Avena Sativa (Oat Straw)

• acts as a natural aphrodisiac which keeps your sex drive up in today's stressful and hectic times
  

• aids in combating erectile dysfuntion and premature ejaculation, so you won't have to utter the phrase "this never happens" to the ladies
  

• reduces anxiety
  

• increases energy

• lowers triglyceride levels, which is key to maintaining healthy heart function  

• high in fiber and packed with essential nutrients

• oatmeal is relatively cheap, which frees up money for you toimprove your game in other areas, especially during these recessionary times we live in
  

You don't want to turn out like Homer Simpson, so kill the donuts and step your breakfast game up!


Steel Cut Oats (best oatmeal option)
Avena Sativa capsules
More benefits of Avena Sativa

88 Keys featuring Kanye West - "Stay Up! (Viagra)"



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Fear Is the Root of Most of Your Problems

If I could choose one way to improve a man’s game that would eliminate many of his problems, it would be to conquer fear. When you really think about it, fear is what prevents a man from ever having a chance with the type of woman he truly wants to be with.

Fears rears its head in many ways. Fear can keep you from speaking to that fly woman you see at your local bar that you think is out of your league. Fear can keep you from upgrading your wardrobe and trying new styles because you don’t think you can pull it off.  Fear can prevent you from truly expressing your personality in social situations because you’re scared of not being accepted for who you truly are, and are afraid that people won’t be interested in what you have to say.

What I’ve noticed in my own life is that the best things usually happen when I confront things with a “f*** it” type of attitude. If I was nervous about approaching some woman, I would just say "f*** it" and head in with something bold and memorable to say. More times than not it actually worked like a charm, to where it came to be my natural style. If I was nervous about a big job interview, I would just say fuck it and walk through the door like I already had a corner office waiting for me with my nameplate ready to put on my door. The "f** it" technique can pretty much work in any situation or area of your life.

The worst thing that can happen to you in most situations in life you’re afraid of is rejection. This fear causes you to actually give up before you even try, and the crazy thing about that is that you’re rejecting yourself before you let anyone else. So the very thing you’re afraid of, you’re actually doing to yourself. If that’s the case, then fearing rejection is obviously a waste of your damn time. If you’re scared to talk to that woman and you don’t, you’re still going home alone. If you’re afraid to screw up that job interview, you’ll probably walk in sweating like a fry cook, nervous as hell, and you won’t get the job anyway. Fear is a losing man’s game and you don’t want to be in the starting lineup.

Here is a short list of fears that I’ve noticed in my lifetime that have held men back from reaching their true potential:

• Fear of women

• Fear of success

• Fear of rejection

• Fear of hard work

• Fear of change

• Fear of the truth

• Fear of pain

• Fear of failure

We all weren’t born fearless super heroes, ready to pimp slap the world and attain victory at every stage of life.  Real men are the ones who admit to and confront their fears.  The losers are the ones who stand there in denial as their potential for improvement and a chance at greatness passes them by.  Figure out if you have any fears that are blocking your path to success and tackle them.

The world is yours like Pete Rock and Nas in '94.


Nasty Nas- The World Is Yours

The Man Code: Lifetime Game

Lifetime Game is simple. Lifetime Game is all about keeping your game tight so that you will have a better life not only now, but for the rest of your life. Lifetime Game is about building a solid foundation as a man, enhancing your position in life, and experiencing life the way it should be experienced. This blog will cover a broad range of topics, but will be centered around the following major areas of a man's life:


Relationships/Women

Health and Wellness

Fashion

Intellectual Pursuits

Recreation

Arts

Career/Finance


Check back often as I will be updating frequently in my quest to enhance my game and yours as well. Keep your game tight morning, noon, and night.


Big Daddy Kane- "Smooth Operator"